Good night NE

tonight is my last night living in "the basement". I put it in quotation marks because it means so much more than just living below some one's home.

I've lived here since the first weekend in September. This is the first weekend in January. Four months. There has been a lot of ups and downs, although, unfortunately, more downs than ups for me. When all is said and done, I have nothing but gratitude for the friends who let me live in their home so graciously for practically nothing financially. I'm sure I will look back at this experience as a farce and just part of my wild adventure back in America.

Part of me feels like I am officially closing the chapter to Kyla before Japan. When I came back it was easy to slide back into the life I knew, but it wasn't the same and I knew it never would be. My friend Chris was telling me the other day, "I can't act like the whole year in Japan never happened." I suppose I never really thought that I was, but I can see how that could have happened.

Lessons I learned while living in this house for 4 months : Sometimes the most verbal communication can say nothing about what you are meaning and that silence has the power to say everything. I also learned that life is too short to placate a comfortable living situation, however necessary it may be at the time.

I really want to learn a balance between going along with something so as not to rock the boat (knowing that I will shortly be leaving the situation full stop) and trying to prove my point to the death (not literally). I think just being able to see where I am on this spectrum has helped me grow exponentially.

No more spiders, no more cold house. No more having to wear a stocking cap to sleep. No more post its (maybe). No more emails. No more reminders. There will still be a cat gate to jump over but it won't be to get up and down the stairs. No more windows left open. No more "no boys" policy in my room. No more walking through a dark house. No more - can't leave my electric toothbrush plugged in. No more recycling on the floor by the front door.

I am looking forward to being just friends again. (long pause). yup.

Next week I will be living in SE with another couple. Kim and Adam. Kim I've known since junior high. Next week I'll start my new job at the Kennedy school being a food runner - which I have mixed feelings about. Excited when I think about the job, and then insecure about my "title" - oh fuck it. Find out about Wellsfargo on Monday...so maybe 2 jobs. Chuck will be in town. Of course. Let it all start all over again. Let the fresh rain pour down and another day begin.